#Oscars: Will Live-Tweet for Cheeseburgers

Billy wasn't funny; It shoulda been Eddie; J-Lo was nipply; Angelina looked hungry; Colin was Firthy; Meryl was *Meryl*, and we now worship at the altar of socialist France. Merde. -ABLxx
oscars tfy abl ablc
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Imani Gandy @AngryBlackLady
I’ve only ever eaten at Pink’s on La Brea once. It was on Oscar night. What makes people wait hours for a weenie, I’ll never understand.
Imani Gandy @AngryBlackLady
The Artist is going to win everything. Didn’t anyone watch the BAFTAs?
Imani Gandy @AngryBlackLady
As long as Crash or Gladiator don’t win again, I’ll be happy. #Oscars
Imani Gandy @AngryBlackLady
Shorter #Oscars: Let’s put on evening wear and wander around Hollywood Blvd in the middle of the afternoon. It’s kinda “Pretty Woman.”
Dub Pool @dubpool
I would enjoy an #oscars red carpet where the actors walk in with designers draped over their shoulders. #WhoAreYouWearing?
Imani Gandy @AngryBlackLady
Colin Firth makes me feel firthy in my nether regions. #Oscars
Jessica @vdaze
I don't hate Kelly Osbourne's lilac-wash hair. I'm confused by this.
Jessica @vdaze
Oh, hey. There's J.Lo with a slicked-back up do. That hardly ever happens. #oscars
Imani Gandy @AngryBlackLady
Why is J.Lo. wearing the same outfit that Mary Lou Retton wore in the 84 Olympics? #Oscars
Imani Gandy @AngryBlackLady
Jean Dujardin is probably the frenchest dude on the planet. Settle down, mon frère. #oscars
Jessica @vdaze
Natalie Portman bores the crap out of me. #oscars
Imani Gandy @AngryBlackLady
Gwynnie? A nice red lipstick is your friend. I can't tell where your dress ends and your face begins. #Oscars
Imani Gandy @AngryBlackLady
Who woulda thunk that Brad Pitt would divorce Jennifer Aniston and then years later show up on the red carpet w/ the Rachel haircut? #Oscars
Jessica @vdaze
As usual, Angelina Jolie looks like a husband-stealing whore. #TeamJennifer #NoImNotOverIt #STFU #oscars
Imani Gandy @AngryBlackLady
Sandy? I love you. Really. Miss Congeniality is my secret shame. But seriously? Sergeant Pepper called; he wants his epaulets back. #Oscars
For Chief, This Is It @jesseltaylor
What are you doing with your life that you're an Oscar screamer? #Oscars #tweetroast
Lizz "Executive Time" Winstead @lizzwinstead
This red carpet coverage is starting to feel so unendingly torturous it's like I am watching The Killing Fields #Oscars #tweetroast
Zandar Enjoys Muellered Cider @ZandarVTS
#WhaaPeople: "Have you seen The Help?" #BlahPeople: has changed their relationship with #WhaaPeople to "It's complicated. Still."
Imani Gandy @AngryBlackLady
Win. RT @hipstermermaid: Emma Stone looks absolutely stunning in Lindsay Lohan's former career. #Oscars
For Chief, This Is It @jesseltaylor
The Oscars are like my church if I hated my church and disagreed with virtually all of its decisions. #Oscars #tweetroast
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