abl - Chirpstory

I live-tweeted the Opening Ceremony from the past. Read More

What started out as a "maybe I'll live-tweet as I listen to the oral arguments hahaha" idea turned into a four hour project. I think I'll mark up the transcript with the must-re.. Read More

So this happened... again. Pay close attention to dooglives' repeated demands that I answer his questions about whether I hold POTUSes to the "same critical standard." Notice.. Read More

Today was pretty boring. Basically, they argued whether or not the individual mandate could be severed from the rest of the bill should the Court decide to strike down the indivi.. Read More

Billy wasn't funny; It shoulda been Eddie; J-Lo was nipply; Angelina looked hungry; Colin was Firthy; Meryl was *Meryl*, and we now worship at the altar of socialist France. Mer.. Read More

Make it stop. Somebody. For the love of whatever. -ABLxx Read More

1) Watch Vampire Diaries; 2) ???? 3) PROFIT! Read More

Because patriotism. -ABLxx P.S. I made it right to the end of the address before being thrown into Twitmo, so I didn't include any Mitch Daniel-related tweets. I know you're.. Read More

I had a doozy of a chirpstory going last night and then I lost it. Stupid computer. So I'm just throwing my own tweets in a story. Sorry all those other people whose tweets we.. Read More

Because America. -ABLxx Read More

You're welcome. Read More

People are jumping up my ass because I had the temerity to express some criticism about this Wall Street occupation business. I think folks missed the tweets where I expressed.. Read More

I don't know who started these tax cut humor shenanigans, but I was LITERALLY*** dying of laughter. ***And by "literally," I mean "figuratively." -ABLxx Read More

Twitter is at its best when it is reacting to natural disasters... which is why we're all going to be found dead with our fingers melted into our keyboards when a Serious Disaste.. Read More

This Chirpstory is a nice companion to the "Anthony Noel is a Nutbag" Chirpstory from hell. It's short and amusing. Let it wash over you like so many tears of a clown. Read More

No comment necessary. ETA: Comment added: Meet Anthony Noel. He is pretending to be a "progressive." Likely trained in the basement of some conservative think tank, he has bee.. Read More

I slapped a bunch of funny tweets together. The end. Read More

I don't know why I just spent twenty minutes compiling this chirpstory. Mostly because I recall being oddly obsessed with goats yesterday. I also recall some good information c.. Read More

Earlier today, I was being silly (as I am wont to do), and fired off these tweets. And then I called my mom and told her about it. Long story short, she thinks I'm silly. Whic.. Read More